Depressed

2nd day of work without lao ban again..
do i really need to jot down wads happening since lao ban left..? i made myself looked so stupid..

Hmm.. i seriously need somebody to speak with.. but somebody is not around to listen.. maybe somebody thought that i'm enjoying my life now.. somebody does not know i need to talk.. i gave up!!

At least someone cheered me up today.. i was offered a chance to the ndp full-dressed rehersal this saturday.. was thinking to go back to batu pahat over the weekends, but i think it is better for me to go out to the crowd and get some fresh human air even there might be H1N1.....

i was totally annoyed by the weird dream since last thursday.. mum called me early this morning to make very sure that i'm alright.. coz she had a frightening dream last nite.. the dream was about me but she refused to tell me wads the dream was all about.. i feel like crying.. Mum's too worried..

I'm not afraid of death.. i'm not afraid of dreaming friend who passed away.. dont make it sounds scary.. it''s fate that everyone will die on one fine day.. there's people die everyday but it is not good to keep talking about death in normal days like these.. it makes me miss syn liang badly these few days.. i feel depressed, i'm in low spirit..